Chuck's Rooundhouse, Can Kill a Husky
Slow Down, I know what you’re thinking. Chuck Norris with one quick round house kick would Texas Ranger Stephen in two seconds flat? Maybe twenty years ago.
Stephen, With his sword of Truth
Now, Today, Stephen Colbert is a spry 45 years old and Chuck Norris is 65.
That’s a twenty year age difference and anyone who watches professional fighters knows that even a year or two can make or break someone’s chance of winning.
Chest Hair, Ouch
Chuck Norris still stays in shape with his total gym, but it’s not like Stephen doesn’t work out as well. Remember, lets look at Chuck’s record. Sure, he’s had some wins? Well, at least in the movies where he’s pretend beating up jokers. In real life, Bruce Lee owned Chuck.
You say, “That was Bruce, and he’s bad ass in his own right”, but did you know about Chuck’s humiliating loses to Joe Lewis and Allen Steen? Did you know about his loss to Louis Delgado. On November 24, 1968?
It Would be Cool to Get RoundHoused By Chuck
Of course Chuck ended up avenging most of his losses and I’m a huge fan of his past accomplishments, but I have doubts that he could take Mr. Colbert.
Chaffetz Loses By Decision Against Colbert
Stephen is no stranger to physical contests. Earlier this year he leg wrestled and beat one of his long time opponents. Stephen has a huge gang of followers. I’m not saying that Mr. Norris doesn’t have any fans, but has he ever been ordered to shave his head by the president?
Sweetness
If You’re doubting that Stephen would have a chance, don’t forget about his .38 revolver “Sweetness” that Stephen carries on him at ALL Times. If you read into Stephen’s past you’ll see that he’s had a hard life, and I’m not going to get into details because this is a comedy blog, that would be over the line. We can argue a good case for Stephen, but who knows, Chuck might be able to take him? I really don’t know.
Toilet Paper of Chuck Norris